Cheap Spiders 2 (Video) (Sam Firstenberg) Price

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Customer Reviews of Spiders 2

Now, granted, a B (or C or D) movie like this isn't going to have a plot out of Shakespeare, but why not have a story that makes a modicum of sense? There are so many flaws I can't possibly enumerate them all, but here are a few: Spiders 2 takes place on a cargo ship containing a secret lab in which spider and human DNA has been combined--what better place than a ship rolling on the high seas to have a lab full of glassware for experimentation? Human DNA does nothing but make the spiders supersized, like a McDonald's Value Meal--there are no hideous human/spider creatures (think The Fly or Alien Resurrection), just big bugs. At the end of the movie a truly gigantic spider as wide as the entire ship and ten times larger than the human sized spiders we'd seen before emerges--where this beast could have been throughout the rest of the film we have no idea, and it does nothing more than go down with the ship. In the final scene, guys in the rescue helicopter drop a hand grenade down to the heroine, who's holding on to her husband with one hand, being pulled down by a giant spider on one leg, with the wash of the helicopter rotor affecting her from above and the motion of the sea on the crate the spider is in from below--and she catches it one handed. Sign the girl up as an outfielder in the big leagues! Even the shoes the heroine wears are stupid--she was rescued from a sailboat where she'd undoubtedly be wearing deck shoes, and we're told that she's the only woman on board so the clothes they give her will probably be too big for her (fortunately, they aren't, and the tank top she wears is quite fetching)--where did the pumps with two inch heels come from? Is the ship not only infested with giant spiders, but also drag queens? Hmm, come to think of it, that would have made a better movie. There are a few decent special effects, but some really awful ones. Frankly, much of the film looks like what my son did when he was about five years old, playing with his rubber toys.

The only two reasons to see this are if you think it's campy enough to be funny (maybe, especially if you're influenced by hallucinogenic substances, but remember, the drag queens were my idea) or if you've got the hots for Stephanie Niznik. She's a fox, but can't save the film for me. Better spend your money on Deep Rising, a terrific, scary, funny film with another gorgeous heroine.

Spiders 2: Mad Scientist Meets "Aliens"
There is absolutely no connection between the original SPIDERS and SPIDERS 2, except for the inevitable big crawling and bouncing arachnids. Director Sam Firstenberg tries with middling success to meld the traditional Big Bug movies of the 50s with the claustrophobic feel of Sigourney Weaver battling the slimy Aliens of that series. The result is a mess that does not allow for either plot believability or character/audience involvement.

Stephanie Niznik is Alexandra, who, with her remarkably wimpy husband, is picked up out of the ocean by a sea captain (Daniel Quinn) and a mad scientist type (Richard Moll), both of whom are conducting experiments to combine spider with human DNA. Naturally, no explanation is given as to why this should inevitably lead to spiders growing as big as Buicks. SPIDERS 2 starts out more as a dramatic mystery that only hints at the existence of huge spiders. Alexandra's husband is less interesting than the Daniel Quinn character who takes a liking to her. Richard Moll gets to prance about waving his arms as he shouts out, "My experiments will revolutionize genetic science!" The second half bogs down into a scene by scene ripoff of ALIENS 2 and 3. Ms. Niznik battles both evil henchmen and mutated spiders, even as she wears the same T-shirt worn by Sigourney Weaver. The assorted spiders seem more disgusting than threatening. SPIDERS 2 would have been greatly improved had director Firstenberg tried for originality rather than variations on the tough broad in a T-shirt theme.

THEY TOOK THE SEQ OUT OF SEQUEL
Why didn't they just go ahead and name this Breeding Ground or something? It does not pick up where Spiders left off. It really has nothing to do with the original. So why do these movie makers try and "cash in" on a previous films success by fooling the viewer that it is a true sequel. Anyway, now that we've dealt with that, let's move on to this subpar sequel. First of all, Richard Moll (the only known actor) in this movie is worse than any of the less known performers. Makes one wish Vincent Price was still alive or they had the money to pay for someone like Christopher Lee. At any rate, he is so inane and ineffectual, one can't wait till he gets his just dessert!
Stephanie Niznik could easily pass for Susan Sullivan (Falcon Crest) daughter, and joins the countless females who finds the opportunity to strip down to her Sigourney Weaver t-shirt when it comes time to battle the monsters. It ticks me off that they're gearing away from male heroes, particularly when Niznik is so unsupportive of her husband when he was right. The film-makers then decided to make her husband (the dimpled Grant Cromer) look wimpish. Add Daniel Quinn as the oh-so-nice captain who wants to woo Niznik away from her seemingly demented husband, and what a remarkable cast of bad actors looking good. As for the effects, considering the budget, they were okay. Some shots looked good; others not so good.
But after all was done, I still had a good time. There was some tense moments and the ending pretty wild. (Kudos to the writers for not having the happy ending turn sour, and believe me, they could have.)
Anyway, Spiders 3 should bring back Josh Green and carry on with their storyline.